Elaina is quitting the show for a variety of reasons, but the relevant one is sexism at Rocky. She convinced me that the problem is extensive, but I don’t know how to respect those concerns and still encourage the individual creative talents and sexualities of our members and the boundary-pushing of the show. But I think we can find a way, and enjoy our work better for reaching for it.

Sexism has become a party-crashing term. People worry that if they acknowledge it, it will make every decision more difficult and force us to be more conservative. It shouldn’t. Sexism itself– the faulty societally-ingrained role preconceptions we have– is inherently incredibly conservative and creativity-blocking. By harboring it, we cripple the sexual and individual potential of our members.

I think that the best solution to the sexism problem has to do with promoting an attitude at the show, not by making rules, and I think we can do it, because we’re strong, freely-sexual people who want to promote sexual equality. This attitude would be characterized by honest recognition of how our actions and shows play out sexual stereotypes, and the constant search for what’s beyond them.

One aspect of this attitude might be that men at Rocky would be encouraged (expected) to put themselves on sexual display as much as women. It will make us better men. Another is that we should consider the sexism-jostling potential of our preshows. We can get more out of challenging our audience than playing to its fantasies.

Next week: How to get the most out of a rape fantasy…