I’ve been struggling to recover my childhood over the past few years. See, my memory contains a profound gap. I recall almost nothing of my life before I was about 12. Since then, my memory and sense of self seems like a continuous thread; before it, I know what others have told me, but it never resonates the same way.<\/p>\n
At least, that is how things stood a few years ago. Since my summer quest to better understand my father, I have been chipping away at that wall (or, to keep my metaphors consistent, chipping away at the ledge to give me a stairway across the gap). I have been grabbing onto fleeting images, cataloging together floating pieces, and generally disbelieving that these memories are not mine to share.<\/p>\n
Here is the product of my most recent tact. I thought to dissect who I am today as the extension of ribbons that have evolved over my life. Every couple of years, these ribbons take on a new turn– an every 7 they twist into a new core (something I’m due again for soon). The roadmap I have figured out is incomplete, but it goes something like this:<\/p>\n
| Years<\/th>\n | Self<\/th>\n | Community<\/th>\n | Inspiration<\/th>\n | Practice<\/th>\n<\/tr>\n |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 2013-5<\/td>\n | World modeler<\/td>\n | Collaborations<\/td>\n | complexity<\/td>\n | coupled models<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2010-2<\/td>\n | Dev. at large<\/td>\n | SusDev<\/td>\n | worldchanging<\/td>\n | susdev. classes<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2008-9<\/td>\n | Traveling Dev.<\/td>\n | Flame<\/td>\n | social justice<\/td>\n | TN startup<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2006-7<\/td>\n | Contract Dev.<\/td>\n | Rocky<\/td>\n | traveling<\/td>\n | signal processing<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2004-5<\/td>\n | Olin superninja<\/td>\n | Olin College<\/td>\n | big ideas<\/td>\n | education<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2002-3<\/td>\n | Growing Jimmy<\/td>\n | SCA<\/td>\n | human models<\/td>\n | dance<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 2000-1<\/td>\n | MIT student<\/td>\n | ESG & Random<\/td>\n | philo. & learning<\/td>\n | study groups<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1998-9<\/td>\n | STEM geek<\/td>\n | Computer lab<\/td>\n | college<\/td>\n | webpages<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1996-7<\/td>\n | Smart aleck<\/td>\n | Lowell home<\/td>\n | self-directed edu.<\/td>\n | math<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1994-5<\/td>\n | Slowpoke<\/td>\n | Lunch gang<\/td>\n | self-discipline<\/td>\n | programming<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1992-3<\/td>\n | Basementeer<\/td>\n | Moving schools<\/td>\n | collecting<\/td>\n | BBSes<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1990-1<\/td>\n | Sleep-less<\/td>\n | Redwood Valley Elem.<\/td>\n | fantasy<\/td>\n | taking apart<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1988-9<\/td>\n | James Friends<\/td>\n | Capella Elem.<\/td>\n | invention<\/td>\n | reading<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n |
| 1986-7<\/td>\n | Mama’s boy<\/td>\n | Lutheran school<\/td>\n | sister problems<\/td>\n | no naps<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n There are connections between all of these, which I can’t represent in the table: features that disappear and reappear for reasons complex and unknown. But for all it’s abstruseness, that is my life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I’ve been struggling to recover my childhood over the past few years. See, my memory contains a profound gap. I recall almost nothing of my life before I was about 12. Since then, my memory and sense of self seems like a continuous thread; before it, I know what others have told me, but it … Continue reading A life history in phases<\/span> |